Pearls of Wisdom

Wisdom for Women

Proverbs 24:3-4 Three Steps to Establish Joy in The Home

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Recently, I attended a Women’s Conference sponsored by my church. The theme was ‘Joy through the Journey’.  Approximately 150 women gathered to hear speakers talk about how to establish joy in various aspects of one’s life. I chose to attend establishing ‘joy’ in the home.

As women, we play a key role in establishing and maintaining the mood and atmosphere in the home.  In the role as wife and mother, I believe the woman shares the responsibility (Proverbs 14:1) to create an environment in which children feel safe, and a place where family members will want to retreat, relax and unwind from daily stress.

Key Verse

Proverbs 24:3-4 ‘By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding, it is established; through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures.’

If we examine the above verse, we find that wisdom is defined as ‘having the ability to think and act in such a way that common sense prevails and decisions made are beneficial and productive.’  The word treasure is defined as ‘something of great worth or value; a person esteemed as rare and precious.’

To restate this verse, one might say ‘a house should be built on a foundation of common sense and well thought out decisions.  The decisions made within the household should be mutually beneficial and productive to all valued members of the household.  Sounds easy, doesn’t it?

Now, I’d like for you to think back over the last three months.  Was the atmosphere in your home stress free? Friendly, inviting, loving? Were there silent wars taking place between family members? Arguing? Complaining? More importantly, were you modeling the Proverbs 31 woman – the virtuous and capable wife or the Proverbs 14:1 woman, tearing her house down with her own hands?

Steps to Establishing Joy in the Home

Shifting the atmosphere in your home can be done by consistently following a few simple steps:

1)      Ask God to give you a clean heart.  Repent of anything you may have done to foster a negative and unhealthy environment in your home.

2)      Begin praying God’s Word throughout your house.  Sing songs, hymns, or offer praises and thanksgiving as you walk throughout your home. We live in a spiritual world, so conducting a spiritual cleaning is very beneficial to keeping negative energy or spirits out of the home.  I perform a spiritual cleansing of my home at the beginning of each season and can truly feel the difference.  On one occasion, my daughter returned home from a weekend trip.  In her absence, I smudged and performed a spiritual cleansing of the home.  Upon her return, not knowing that I had smudged, she stated that her room felt different. It felt clean and calming.

3)      Think before you speak. Pray and ask God to help you find the right words when conversing with loved ones. This will help to improve communication which leads to healthier relationships.

As we begin our efforts to obtain joy at home, remember to bathe each family member in prayer daily. Consider playing praise music in your home rather than watching TV. Try to connect emotionally with each family member daily so there are no concerns festering beneath the surface.  Soon you will begin to detect a pleasant change in your home.  I have not mastered this process myself but am trying to be more deliberate in my efforts.

What are you doing to establish or maintain joy in your home? Let’s share ideas Thursday during our live blog chat.

Please join us for Thursday’s live blog chat at 8:00 p.m. EST.  Please call 1-712-770-8009;  Code: 335261. Share your thoughts regarding this post.

Proverbs 28:27 – Caring for the Poor

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Do you struggle with how to respond to a beggar when they approach you asking for money? When I worked downtown, there were always homeless people on the street begging for money. Now, I’m often approached in grocery stores by people who are shopping and ask for money to buy food.  Years ago, I used to respond by giving them whatever change I may have had in my pocket. In some cases, I would go as far as buying them a sandwich because I knew how my money was being spent.

Social service agencies discourage people from giving money directly to beggars.  There are governmental services and support available for the homeless that go unclaimed because the homeless prefer to panhandle on the streets.  I’m hesitant now giving them money in fear of enabling them to feed an unhealthy habit.  I also don’t want to be hustled by professional scammers who pose as the homeless and beg on the streets.  Yet, you don’t want to see anyone in need go without. It’s a tough dilemma.  I decided to seek wisdom from the Bible about giving money to the poor.

The book of Proverbs is full of wisdom regarding the poor. The message is clear throughout Proverbs that God made both the rich and the poor. (Proverbs 22:2) Although the poor are often despised, neglected and exploited, God desires that the poor be treated with the same concern and care as the rich. God has charged His children with taking care of and protecting the poor from those who would exploit them. (Proverbs 29:7)

I could not find anywhere in the Bible where the responsibility of caring for the poor was on the shoulders of the government.  It’s not a bad thing that government funded social services are available to the poor. However, outside of the tax payers’ contribution, God does imply that the righteous are still accountable for the care of the poor.  Failure to do so has consequences. “Whoever shuts their eyes to the cry of the poor will also cry out and not be answered.”  Proverbs 21:13.

One of my former Sunday school teachers said that she gave money to anyone who approached her. She kept change in her pocket for that reason. She did not believe it was her job to judge how the money was used.  She felt that she was following what God wants us to do and that God would honor her intentions, regardless of how the money was used. After researching Proverbs, I believe she was on to something.

“Those who give to the poor will lack nothing, but those who close their eyes to them receive many curses.” Proverbs 28:27

Lord, please open my heart to be sensitive to the poor and to generously provide for their spiritual, emotional and financial needs. In Jesus’s name, amen.

 

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At the Movies: Featuring ‘The Shack’

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I recently saw the movie ‘ The Shack’. I thoroughly enjoyed the book and was looking forward to seeing how this story translated to the screen. Often, Christian movies are low budget films, and the message is lost due to the low quality of the movie. However, I was pleasantly surprised with the movie version of this book.

A few years ago, I led a small group Bible study for women in my home. I selected the book ‘The Shack’, for our group to study. When I told a church ministry leader about my selection, he was leery. He felt that the themes in the book were questionable and could mislead or confuse people in their spiritual walk.  I took his advice under consideration, but ultimately stuck with my book choice.

This book was written as an allegory by a man who was trying to explain the love of God and God’s relationship with man to his children. It’s a story about a tragedy, and God’s presence throughout the tragedy and the pain that follows.  It challenges our thoughts about God and His relationship with us. Most importantly, it challenges our thoughts of preconceived ideas about the nature of God, that we’ve learned through religious practices and teachings.  You must move outside of traditional thinking to truly appreciate the book’s message.

For weeks, my group studied this story. One of the ladies was a little uncomfortable with it, but over time, through our discussions, she became more accepting of it. For me, I found it was life changing.  The other ladies in the group enjoyed it equally as much. In fact, because of the enthusiasm our husbands witnessed from our book discussion, they too decided to read the book and enjoyed it as well! I’ve shared this book with many others, who’ve also found it enlightening.

To my delight, the movie was very well made with A-list actors. I wouldn’t label it a Christian movie, nor was it billed as one. No one claimed to be God, or Jesus and the spiritual message was very subtle.  It was light-hearted yet thought provoking. I strongly encourage everyone to see this movie or read the book. It is great entertainment with a  message about God’s loving nature.

“And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.” I John 4:16

 

If you’ve read the book or seen the movie, The Shack, please join us for Thursday’s live blog chat at 8:00 p.m. EST. Please call 1-712-770-8009; Code: 335261.  Let us know how the movie or book impacted you.

Proverbs 29:25 – Trusting God is Your Safest Bet

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I was speaking to a friend recently about some problems she was experiencing on her job.  The work relationship with one of her co-workers had become strained, due to other things that were occurring on the job.  There were some promises made that never materialized.  We discussed strategies and things she could do to alleviate the stress and enhance the relationship. I suggested that she try to determine what God was saying to her through this experience.  When God stirs or allows others to stir the pot, there’s a reason.

After prayer and reflection, she said that she felt better about the situation. I asked her what had changed.  She said that she was going to let God fight the battle for her. From past experiences, she said that she had always fared better when she stepped back and trusted God. There was nothing else I could say. My friend had learned to wait and put her confidence in the LORD. He had never failed her. Why would HE now?

Disappointments are inevitable. It’s part of life. Whether it’s your boss, your child, spouse, friend or neighbor, don’t get caught up in what man says or does. In all circumstances, put your hope and confidence in the LORD.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5-6

Father God, give me the wisdom and patience to wait on you and to trust that you have the perfect answer to all my situations. In Jesus’s name, amen.

 

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What’s Done in the Dark, Will Come to the Light

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It happened as I approached the lunch counter exhibit at the National Museum of African American History and Culture. I got this overwhelming feeling of sadness.  Becoming emotional, I asked God why did African Americans have to go through such horror and injustice to fight for equality in this country?  Feeling angry, I reflected on the current state of our political and social system, and thought, God, nothing has changed. We’re still fighting and in fact, it’s actually worse. Among the crowds of visitors and school kids, I heard God whisper, “No, the fighting will never cease and equality will never be achieved.  If that were to happen, future generations would never understand nor appreciate the sacrifices others made for their freedom.  The sacrifice I made for their freedom.”  I asked God, so what is my part in this struggle? He simply stated, “I need you to tell the story. I want you to use your words to share my thoughts.”

I’ve always had lots of opinions, and was eager to share them through my blog.  Of late, many of my opinions have been driven by the daily antics of our current president and his administration.  During the early days of Trump’s presidency, I avoided watching any news, because I literally cringed whenever I heard his voice.  As his lunacy became more evident it was difficult not to watch him.

One evening as I watched President Trump espousing more ‘alternative facts, God gave me a revelation that instantly gave me peace of mind. I thought back on the Bible verse Luke 12:2,  “There is nothing concealed that will not be disclosed, or hidden that will not be made known.”  For all the lies President Trump has told, the promises broken, the verbal and sexual assaults he’s made to women, the unfounded and insulting accusations made, the unethical, immoral and illegal policies he’s tried to pass, those he has discriminated against and the unethical business practices he’s involved with, one day he will stand account. Congress may not have the courage to hold him accountable, but he, like all of us, must account for our actions to God.  What deeds he has done, will come to light.

As I said in an earlier post, I do believe that God allowed Trump to become President to show America’s true heart.  Since the beginning of this country and the institution of slavery, America’s heart has not changed.  Double standards will always remain. MSNBC’s The Last Word moderator, Lawrence O’Donnell believed that Congress nor the American people would have had the patience with President Obama as they have with President Trump. Congress would have been midway through the impeachment process if President Obama had attempted half of what President Trump has said or done, with little or no consequence.

Yes, the fight for equality continues. What will your part in the struggle be?

“For there is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed and nothing concealed that will not be known or brought out into the open.”         Luke 8:17

 

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What’s Driving Your Fear?

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I was out walking one sunny morning, enjoying the unusually warm weather for a winter day.  The light breeze felt good on my face and I found it very peaceful. I began thinking about the large amount of fear and anxiety that exists in our society today. What exactly is causing so much fear? More importantly, why are people choosing certain ways to respond to this fear?

I find that people are consumed with fear when they feel threatened.  The perceived threat could be the result of something as simple as a ‘change’. Humans are creatures of habit, so a change in our routine, environment, or even what we may eat moves us into an unfamiliar territory, leading to mild or extreme stress. Not knowing what to expect can be as stressful as watching the change take place, and having to decide how to deal with the change. I find that fear, if left unchecked, can easily move into hysteria.

I thought back to Jesus, the Pharisees and the crucifixion. The Pharisees, a group of Jewish leaders that were fiercely devoted to keeping the laws of God, hated Jesus. Some of the reasons for their dislike were based on Jesus’s actions, but other reasons were based on the fear of what could happen. Jesus had no problem calling out the Pharisees for their hypocrisy and scruples about the law. The threat that Jesus posed to their traditions was very real to this religious group. As Jesus’s popularity among the Jewish people grew, they feared His influence would also grow, which would threaten the security, prestige and income of the Pharisees.

The Pharisees had a cozy relationship with the Roman government and now Jesus was threatening to upset life for them all. So when Jesus committed the ultimate offense of blasphemy, an offense punishable by death, the Pharisees’ anger and fear turned into hysteria.  Jesus proclaimed to be the Son of God. Do you know what this would have done to the status and authority of the Pharisees if the idea of Jesus being the Son of God permeated among the Jewish people? Case closed. Jesus had to go.

How many times do we let an idea or a thought drive our emotions to a heightened level? Often, our fears are backed with little substance – only a highly-charged imagination. The Pharisees did not have the discernment or faith to even consider that Jesus could be the son of God. Instead, they allowed their jealousy, anger and fear drive them to put an innocent man to death.

What things are threatening you today? Are you fearful of a change taking place? Do you feel like you’ve lost control and just want things to return to status quo? Once you discover the cause of your fear, you have a choice in how you react. You can embrace the change, grow and learn to appreciate the good in all things, situations and people. Or, like the Pharisees, you can remove anything or anyone that threatens your world or your peace, possibly eliminating that one perfect gift.

“For God did not give us a spirit of timidity (of cowardice, of craven and cringing and fawning fear), but (He has given us a spirit) of power and of love and of calm and well-balanced mind and discipline and self-control.” (II Timothy 1:7 AMP).

 

 

 

Proverbs 12 – Recognizing Misspoken Truths

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As children, we were taught that if it’s not the ‘truth’, then it’s a lie. There were no variations of lying, such as a ‘white’ lie.  A lie was a lie.

Today, there is a new, and supposedly more acceptable term for lying, known as ‘alternative facts’.   Alternative facts are spoken when someone is unwilling to acknowledge or accept the truth presented. Instead, other explanations are fabricated to explain or justify ones own beliefs or their actions for their own pride or purposes.

Proverbs 12 says a lot about the consequences of untruthfulness.

“The LORD detest lying lips, but he delights in people who are trustworthy. Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue lasts only a moment. Those who lie to create confusion and disruption, will themselves experience confusion and disruption in their lives.” (vs 21) 

Words can be reckless if not spoken responsibly, causing much hurt and confusion.  If maligned words are continuously spoken, it could provide insight into ones heart.  God loves and honors those whose lips speak words that uplift and inspire. It is His will that you surround yourself with those who can speak positivity and encouragement into your life.

Despite those who may try to mislead us with various forms of untruths, be mindful that God is a gracious and merciful God, who delights in those who are trustworthy, promote peace and have joy. (v20).

Father, help us not to be tricked or misled by misspoken truths and those whose intentions are not honorable or wise. Surround us with those whose lips are filled with good things, providing words of healing, wisdom and truth. In Jesus’s name, Amen.

 

Proverbs 14 – Be Thoughtful With Your Steps

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March 1 is Ash Wednesday, the beginning of the Lenten season. Lent is a time Christians spend in prayer, fasting and self-reflection, in preparation for Easter. During this six week period, some Christians will give up something or refrain from doing something they enjoy, as a sacrifice. The goal is to set aside time for reflection on Jesus Christ – his suffering and his sacrifice, his life, death, burial, and resurrection.

Instead of abstaining from something, I wanted to spend the next six weeks reading and studying the Word of God in depth. Like Solomon, my ongoing quest is to gain more insight and wisdom. Having intelligence is great but if you lack wisdom and discernment, you’ll never get to maximize the intelligence or God’s purpose for your life. You will also miss out on the wonderful opportunities and blessing God has in store for you.

Proverbs is a book of moral and ethical teachings written in part, or maybe all, by Solomon. It was written with the purpose of attaining wisdom and discipline, and for understanding words of insight so that we can make wise decisions.

My goal is to share my insight with you as I venture into my study of Proverbs. So the first Proverbs I’d like to address is Proverbs 14.

Proverbs 14:8

The wisdom of the prudent is to give thought to their ways, but the folly of fools is deception;  

Decisions made in haste lead to waste. I’ve learned that the hard way. I can think back through my life about decisions I made without fully thinking about the consequences connected to my decisions. As I’ve matured, I’ve tried to be more patient with myself and others, allowing God to provide discernment with regards to the steps that need to be taken.

Father, give me patience and understanding so that I don’t fall victim to foolishness and missteps. My ultimate goal is to make decisions that will give me a heart of peace.

In Jesus’s name, Amen.

Choosing One Life Over Another

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I spent over 20 years of my life volunteering for a Christian pro-life organization.  During this time, many lives of unborn children were saved due to the love and care the Christian volunteers showed the moms.  Often, women arrived at the center pregnant, broken and hopeless, wondering how they could afford to feed and care for another child when they could hardly care for themselves. However, these women were showered with love, care and resources that enabled them to think about giving their unborn child a chance at life.  Once a mom chose life for her baby, she was placed in a loving environment with other moms who were all learning to care for their child during their pregnancy and after birth.  As they learned, they earned opportunities to buy baby supplies, which were all donated to the organization by churches and Christian individuals supporting the center’s cause and the pro-life movement.

Today, approximately 11 million undocumented immigrants reside in the United States. It is presumed that most arrived in this country hungry, poor, and broken.  They came to this country, leaving poverty stricken family and loved ones behind. Along the way, they risked their lives hoping to make a better life for themselves and their families.

Approximately 51% of undocumented immigrants are women, many whom have given birth to children since arriving in this country. Yet, while the pregnant moms at the pro- life organization are showered with love to provide life for their unborn child, the undocumented immigrants in this country are showered with hate.  They are forced to live in fear and intimidation as they are hunted by Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE).  For me, this is an eerie reminder of how runaway slaves were hunted by bounty hunters.

Does anybody see a problem with this? Does anybody care that, like slavery, the family unit gets severed through deportation?  Who is going to care for the American born children left behind due to deportation? Are the lives of the women and children helped at the prolife organization more important than the lives of the undocumented women and their children?

These are questions I’m asking myself.  I’d love to hear your thoughts.

“Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother or sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.” (I John 4:20-21)